What’s on your plate these days? Dating, among other things.

I wrote this in a recent email to a friend:

Not a lot on the plate outside the big dinner.

And dating. Dating! Got any leads? I need a distraction from the last few dates – not because they went poorly, but because they went so well. She and I agree – it would be best for me to have another someone to draw my attention. Can you imagine plunging a toe into a relationship, as if it were a headlong dive? That’s about what this is like. Or maybe it’s like dabbling my whole body in the water. Whew!

Other things… I’ve been attending to my blog a lot more lately. It’s coming along nicely. Actually, you can look there to see what I’m looking for in partner and relationship.

And pondering my next steps after I hand off the baton as Chair – thinking about doing improv theater with teens. Yay! Fun!

To clarify – I’m dating casually, and looking for more casual dates, with the knowledge that sometimes this is useful as way to consider the possibility of a longer-term relationship. I haven’t been satisfied with the results of going from zero to serious instantaneously (that would be almost all of them so far), so I’m trying a different approach. While I write about needing “a distraction,” I’m not looking for someone to treat as a distraction – rather, I’m interested in finding another someone to date casually.

Please note that the incapacity to remain friends after dating (or to become friends in the first place) is a deal-breaker for me, even in casual dating past the second date or so. I acknowledge that this is not always an instant process, but it seems to have been almost universally worthwhile since I started college. There’s a lot of energy that goes into a relationship, and it’s worth too much to throw it all away. (Actually, the above email was originally sent to an ex with whom I had a terribly nasty breakup years ago, but who is now a good friend again.)

Sometimes I wonder if anyone has secretly harbored a crush on me. Given the number of secret crushes I’ve had, it wouldn’t surprise me. Now would be a great time to let me in on them.

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